Sweetly Broken

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Fellowship- God's way to touch us

There is a TV show that I used to watch when I was a child, called “Touched by an Angel”. I loved this show and still do, as I recently discovered its showing on TV. This show truly touches my heart, because it makes me relax, brings peace to my mind, and reminds me that God is always in control. Reminds me that angels do exist and that God hears all of my prayers, and sees every tear that I cry. If you have never seen it, know that in this show Monica, Tess and Andrew are angels that God sends to earth, to deliver a specific message of His love to specific people. When the angels first arrive, they never know what the case is about, or why God has them meet with the people. Throughout the whole show they simply wait on God, listen to him and work together supporting one another, and living a life of truth. By the end of the show, all the puzzle pieces come together and their mission is successfully accomplished. That’s what I like to see. What strikes me is the fact that many times, God reveals a little something to one angel without revealing it to the other two. Today, Tess knew that God would have this little boy live with Andrew for a period of time, as Andrew stood up wanting to say something, she gave him a nod assuring him that God just put this action in place, and Andrew submitted to it. The angels must trust one another, so that the Lord can communicate to them and through them, to the rest. For example, Monica speaks prophetically to many people that she meets, and when they ask her how she knew it all, she simply says: “I didn’t. God gives me what I need to know, when I need to know it.”

God is teaching me more and more about how he works in mysterious ways through the fellowship of other believers. Jesus stretched this idea so much, that it truly is important and even essential for a believer to be involved with other believers. Those friends that we meet, who also have the same love for God, will then be our encouragement, accountability and ways through which God will be speaking to us. Once again, because he may reveal a little something to one of my friends, and then that friend will pass that onto me and the rest. Just like with the angels. We need to always be listening to God on our own, in our own secret place, but we also need to pray and fellowship with other believers so that he can use others to work in our hearts. We need to learn how to trust one another, as we live by our faith in God. I always want to tell God how much I love Him, I want to touch him, hug him, kiss him…but I can’t do that in a direct physical way as I could do with my friends. This is what I have been learning through my recent friendships. God wants to touch me, hug me, and kiss me to show me that he loves me, but he can’t come down in a direct physical way to do these things…so he sends me friends who love him, and whom he fills with his love for me…those friends then come and pass it onto me and I know that this is from the Lord. Same for me…I then get a chance to express my love for God, by expressing it to others. How great is that? I love God! Jesus said that if we give water to a thirsty stranger, it is in reality Christ to whom we give this glass of water, because God is with us here. This is why fellowship with other believers and the way that we treat our neighbors is so important to us, Christians, because then we get to face the living God-relational God, who everyday awaits us with many blessings…and the greatest one of all- the blessing love. The angels showed me today, team work between believers which I can see in my friends, because God does work through others, and because he shows us what we need to know, when we need to know. Make sure that you are not being isolated from this great gift of fellowship…this gift that we know as church…because if God gives me something to pass onto someone else, how I will be able to do it, if there is no one in my life to pass it onto? How will I obey God, if I live a self-centered life and don’t care about others in my dorm, work or faith? I will not be able to hear God correctly by isolating myself from everyone else around me, especially those who love the Lord God. And I will not be able to be alive part of God’s Kingdom, if I choose to be alone. In my life, God mostly gives me what I need to know, when I need to know, while I am praying for someone or with someone…when I am surrounded by his children…just like Monica was. Who are you surrounded by? Who is your other part of the team; your accountability; your encouragment; and someone God uses to speak to you?

Father's Love to me

God loves me and I don’t even understand that. I don’t understand it not because our God is foreign to us Christians, but because everyday He continues to love us more and more, and once we acknowledge this fact, we are overwhelmed by His grace and love. I am overwhelmed…God loves me. I don’t understand that. Eph 5:1: “Mostly what God does is love you”. I spent the past FEW weeks on studying this verse and I still don’t get it. God loves me today.
Who am I – in the world?
I am the greatest sinner that I have ever known. I am naturally a selfish being, caring for my own needs first before even thinking of others. I am a prideful self, wanting to be known and loved. I am worldly egoistic. I am needy. I want to be heard. I speak before I listen. My heart is purely bitter. I pierced Christ’s hands…
Who is God?
Unchangeable, lasting forever Love…
Who am I – in Christ?
I am the most forgiven person I have ever known. I am supernaturally transformed into a caring neighbor. I am humbled, before the Throne of my King. I am heavenly generous. I am satisfied. I want to listen. I hear before I speak. My heart is purely holy. I abundantly free by Christ’s blood that washed me clean….
How He loves me?
God loves me so much. He provides for me more than I need. Everyday He gives me things that I take for granted: as my eyes open up- another day to live and praise Him/ another day to be loved by Him; clothes to put on; water to wash my face with; glasses to put on and see my reflection as I put my make up on; smelly soap that I like; dry and clean towel; white socks; comfortable and fitting shoes; food; watch; earrings; CDs to listen to; ability to hear; dentist to fix my teeth; paid bill for school; friends to teach me love; family that is still alive; heart that beats; clean air to breath; no illnesses; body that works; voice to praise Him; lips to kiss the one I love; hands to touch; feet to walk; soft hair; smile; food; all electronics; paper; church; BIBLE; books; fridge to keep my food; ability to taste; shampoo; more food!.....
He has been showing me more love for this past year; semester; week; day… this past year he answered my prayers regarding grace…he taught me about his majestic and never ending grace for us and for me…grace that allows us to live another day…make another mistake…grace that calls me back to him... then he taught me about love of a friend…provided me beautiful and faithful to him friends who love him and because of that, they love me…this allows me to see his love, to learn how to love others and to accept his love…he taught me to love…this past week he showed me love of a father…love I have never experienced before…love that blows my mind…generous love…

…I asked him to teach me about faith…to provide for me all that I need so that I wouldn’t have to spend my little money on anything…from little things to big things…he never failed me…as a matter of fact….he gave me more than I asked him for…more than I ever thought I would have…why? Because he loves me and that love of a father allows him to know what I need to grow…let me tell you what he did:To be honest with you, all I wanted for this Christmas was: wash cloth, d-tape, floss, the Message Remix, Listerine, and I think this was it. No kidding, as I said I wanted him to provide for me all things- big and small so I would not spend any money. I prayed the list over and over. Here is what HE gave me this Christmas: wash cloth!!!, the Message Remix, floss, d-tape, Listerine…I praised him for that and he still had more: my printer broke few months ago, so he gave me a new one, but he gave me best kind- one with scanner and copier in it…more than I needed! Then, he knew I only had one pair of earrings so he gave me some beautiful ones, ones that I would not be able to afford- more than I needed! Then, he gave more books that I will enjoy, more jewelry, more random things that I will use, and…please don’t think that I am trying to brag here…I am not…I want to show you his love for me…shocking just as it came to me…then he gave me Zune…new 30 GB ipod to put my online sermons on it so that I could learn more about the gift he has given me and develop it, as I listen to others who followed him. How is that for a love of a father? He knew I am in the season of learning and developing for him, all the gifts he’s given me and so he provides what I need to do it. I praise you Father for this knowledge and love. I don’t need any of this…I thought I was already rich and set for life…yet the more I look to you… the more I share my heart with you…the more you know me…and the more you see my needs... the more your love provides for me…without me even asking you…you know what I need before I even ask for it…thank you…thank you…

He loves me…with everlasting love…love that remembers no wrongs…love that forgives me…love that is not prideful…love that does not envy…pure love…unconditional love…why? Because I am his child…he gives me things because he wants me to have more than enough…so that I could use it for his glory…to praise his holy name of love…he is my daddy…he wants to give me everything…he gave me this world…this world belongs to him…all that belongs to him belongs to me…because I am in Christ…and Christ’s blood cleanses me from my worst sins…from my bitterness…from my selfish nature…and from my pride…my God loves me…I can’t comprehend that…and if he loves me that much…and if I am the greatest sinner I’ve known…how much more he also loves you…and if you haven’t accepted his love yet…he loves you even more than you can imagine…and he is waiting for you to accept his love…to give you more and more of what you think you might need… to give you his son Jesus Christ…to give you eternal life...to give you peace…to give you joy…to give you home…to give you loving friends…loving parents…loving spirit that will dwell in you and be your best friend and helper...he wants to give you love…take it…tell him you want it…believe and rejoice…accept and glorify him…praise him!
I am not anyone special...i grew up in a poor home...poor spiritually and poor on positive emotions...home with a little love...and poor in a physical sense...God met me there..and took me on a journey...since then..he was more than enough...best friend who listens...dad who cares and provides...and God who loves me...that's why i dont get his love...thats why i have a one full life to observe his love and learn it...and pass it onto you...

"You comfort me with your love, with your hand you’ve rescued me, your righteousness, has made me whole, who is like you, Lord. There is none like you, no-one else compares to all your majesty, the world will know your name as you are lifted high and all will bow down. Who is like you, no one else compares to everything you are to all the things you do. Who is like you, I live because you are my everlasting arms, you are so beautiful. You caled me by name, when I felt lost, with your words, you heal my heart, your loving hands restore my soul, who is like you, Lord. There is none like you…."

washed in Your blood

The walk of shame they put you on,
As a result of the Roman game
Is too long as you fall on your face
Leaving the sweat of your holy grace

100 pounds holding you up
Stripped of all your clothes, my God
You’re looking down as the people pass
You’re looking down deep into their hearts

Son of God humbly you came to earth
Son of Man you took all my shame
Jesus Christ you are the only Lord
Jesus Christ you’re my precious God

Son of God you’re hanging there
Looking down at my shameful face
What did you see in me Lord?
Humbly you took what I deserve

Through the bloody eyes you saw me there
Washed in your blood that was in them
Your hands so stretched out for me,
Telling me you see my broken heart

My God you’re doing this for me
My God I don’t want to see
You go, through all of this
My God please help me see

Drop of blood falls down on me
The conviction of all my sin
The forgiveness of everything I’ve done
And the love that sets me free, my Lord

My God you died there for me
My God you’re all that I now see
Washed in your blood from that cross
My God your love has covered me

Son of God humbly you came to earth
Son of Man you took all my shame
Jesus Christ you are the only Lord
Jesus Christ you’re my precious God

My God you died there for me
My God you’re all that I now see
Washed in your blood from that cross
My God your love has covered me

My God you’re all that I now see Washed in your blood from that cross

Dancing with the King

Sanctuary- an orderly place, with worship team on the stage, congregation singing and awaiting the pastor to give a life-changing [or boring/dry] message, smiles at familiar faces, few handshakes to welcome ‘the new’, and an appropriate position of a Church- goer: sit in silence, worship standing, and faces looking nowhere, but at the pastor, showing their interest and ‘involvement’. Church- as people, for which Christ Jesus died, few believers living out their faith and worshiping the Lord with their bodies and lives 24/7, laying on of the hands to pray for the needy with a trust and faith, that God will do His work, belief that Jesus Christ is alive and His Holy Spirit works among us, on daily bases, the appropriate position of worship is not required, as the body is the temple of the living God- the body always worships its Creator.

There was a homeless man, looking dirty, having old clothes with holes on, rejected by the society ruled by materialism and pride. He was weak, because his body was taken over by hunger and thirst. He was never invited into the Sanctuary, because people were ashamed of him, and thought that his presence and image would scare away the new visitors, as the church claimed to be ‘an outreach’ place. He tried to get in few times, but the security of this church, escorted him out to the front of the parking lot. There was something mysterious about the faith of this man; he knew that church was the place to be and he trusted that every day was new day, and that God’s mercies were new each day, so he kept coming back. Sunday service- he was there, Wednesday afternoon service- he was there and so were the same people, but nobody dared to talk to him or feed him. Until one day, when two young men in their 20’s maybe, who just graduated from college, visiting the town drove by him and saw his heart of faith and brokenness. They parked the car, prayed in their hearts, and led by the Spirit of God went to meet him. He nodded with his head bowed down, sitting on the cold winter ground, as he was too weak from hunger to try to stand up and his humbled and broken heart, that was constantly stabbed by other Christians and society, was also too weak to make an eye contact with another. John immediately took his coat off and put it on the man with gentleness of an angel and respect, as for the king. The man said, he was just a little hungry, and all he needed was a piece of bread to get him on going. The truth was that the man was suffering not only from hunger and broken heart, but also his right leg gave up on him, from an early car accident and he couldn’t move or stand on his own. Peter saw his little stick that he was using to move around, lying next to the man. The Holy Spirit revealed to the young men, all of this, and gave them faith to pray for this man’s healing and renewing of his heart. Peter said: “Sir, we don’t have much ourselves, but what we have we will give to you. In the name of Jesus, be healed and walk!” Then Peter stretched out his hand and helped the man up. Instantly the man was healed and strengthened. His hunger was gone, his heart was made new and clean, and the broken bones in his leg were also rebuilt and healed. The man began to walk, jump around, and praising the Lord Jesus for the gift on which, he so faithfully waited for all of the years. He was dancing, dancing and dancing, for the One who gave him this life of joy and heart of worship! Peter and John were standing there smiling, clapping their hands and praising the Lord for the blessing. The man couldn’t hold the joy inside of him! He kept on shouting out the name of the Lord and giving Him thanks and praise! Meanwhile, the service was disturbed by the noise coming from the outside- un-orderly noise! Some of the congregation went outside and saw the homeless man, dancing and hugging Peter and John, while praising the Lord! They never saw him walk like this before, so they thought it might have been another man. But the more people came out of the church; they knew exactly who this joyful man was! They were ashamed, in their embarrassment and disorder of worship that they didn’t know what to do, because, they were able to see, that this dirty and homeless man, was now shining a light stronger than the whole congregation all together! They knew that his joy was real, his worship honest and his praises filled with God’s love! That day ALL people saw him rejoicing and praising the Lord. The religious order was disrupted by the living God walking and dancing into the temple! The living God, made himself known to ALL the people in that church, and many were attracted to His mystery and glory. He glorified the man so that He could be glorified, among those who were most lost. The homeless person, fully human, filled with the miracles of God through his faith in Jesus Christ alone, and clothed with the presence of the Creator; the man became one with God. The man didn’t care about the proper order of worship made by men. He himself became the temple of the living God and that meant, he became an offering of worship, at the altar of God! That day, Peter and John didn’t attend the service, because they had their own church going on with the homeless man, worshiping, praising and dancing for the King of ALL people, to the order of the Holy Spirit and His anointing.

Oh God, May I always be united with you Lord, rather than people. May I be a daily temple of the living God, rather than merely attending a temple made by men. And may I reflect your glory and dance for you, so that ALL people would see and hear who you are and the joy that you give me. Cloth me today with your presence and fill me and my friends with miracles, for you are the living God, whom I serve and love. Thank you. In Jesus name, Amen.

[Story retold from Acts 3, as I would see it in today’s church. The crippled man in Acts was also rejected by pride and religious order. In today’s world of worship service being put together in a way that is orderly, and goes smooth, think about what it means to truly worship the Lord. And when you think about that for yourself, think then about, how far you are willing to go with your praises, joy and dance for the King and with the King!]
Michelle, this is for you! Never stop on DANCING for the King, who every time asks you to dance with HIM! Continue to reflect His joy through your worship!

The Joy of The First Man

“Finally! Bone of my bone, flesh of my flesh! Name her Woman for she was made from Man.” Man said. [Genesis 2:23-Message Remix]. The Man said finally! After naming all of the animals and working hard for God and being with no partner, God gives him the greatest gift- a woman, to live with, to laugh with, to play with, to talk with, to sleep with, to praise God with. A partner for life! When I read this version, I picture the man jumping around; dancing for the King and praising Him for this beautiful creation- for love; thanking God for the woman. FINALLY! He said FINALLY! The pure and original image of love and fellowship with one another, in marriage and friendship appointed by God. The man had respect and honor for the woman; he knew what it meant being alone and when he received the partner for life, who would be faithful to him, he didn’t even dare to try dishonor her. Instead he praised God for that creation. I long for this kind of love in my future spouse. I long to be the woman created for that ONE man, with whom I can praise God forever and be stronger in my service to Him. Why do woman today, give up so easily on this picture? They give up on waiting for the man God made for them, and also they give up on their purpose by lowering their standards and living unholy lives. They don’t see themselves as beautiful or holy anymore. Why don’t men seem to scream “Finally!” when they meet the girl? Because most of them are not used to waiting, and being busy with God’s business before anything else. “Finally! Bone of my bone!” This implies respect and honor for another, because the two were made out of one, and the two once again become one, in the time appointed by God. This “FINALLY!” puts smile on my face, and purifies the polluted image of purity, that the world put into my mind. I pray that God will speak to you through this story of hope, love and even more love! May God draw a picture on your heart and mind of what it means to be that man and that woman, whom God made to always glorify Him and to be united together in one, as He leads you to each other in His proper and perfect time. I’m excited!

Restoring the Beauty

American girls are some of the most beautiful women in the world, and yet at the same time, they seem to be the most broken and unsatisfied -with their image -women in the whole world. Why? The image I attached represents what most, if not every girl in America goes through. Beautiful on the outside and yet so broken and crying on the inside. The pressure to date, to be a sex object, to look nice, to put make-up on everyday, to be nice and polite, to serve men, to be hospitable, to go along with the crowd and many more things, make the young woman scream and be broken inside. Only few can hear the cry, and for sure God can. Think about how broken His heart must be, to see His creation being beaten up by culture and refusing the natural beauty that He’s given it. American girl: smile that warms you up, hair expressing creativity, freedom and passions; heart full of desires to make a difference; dreams of reaching out with love to others; words that bring peace to your mind; beautiful (sometimes long) legs that will follow the calling; hands always stretched out to hug someone; body- the holy temple of the Holy God; energy that never leaves you bored, and a longing for life-time love relationships. All made in one, by God. All good, all full of potential, all filled with His personal touch and purpose. All sacred, designed for more than any of us can imagine; designed to be holy and to honor Him- the Greatest Lover that any woman, can ever long for or experience. I wonder, if the beautiful women truly are unable to see their beauty- the reflection of the Creator in themselves- when they look in the mirror or on their pictures, as if they are blinded by Him for some mysterious purpose or if they choose to live in denial? I think that they don’t see it, because the only one blinding them is Satan, the creator of lies that get stuck in their minds and hearts, every time someone disgraces the temple of God. The only mystery the Bible speaks of is the mystery of God’s power, goodness and all of His creation. The mystery of His love, which He obviously revealed to a woman by making her a woman, a beautiful woman. I struggle when I see my beautiful girlfriends, beating themselves up for some fake idea of what beauty is; I struggle when they think I joke when I say they are beautiful; and I struggle when they can’t see their true identity in Christ Jesus. How much more does the Father struggle with this? It is like telling Him: “God, it was great, but this nose- you made it too big, this tooth- too crooked, these eyes- sorry, wrong color, these legs- yea, cool for you, but I don’t like this spot of fat formation, my stomach- lets not even go there, and my eyebrows- oh God, why eyebrows?” So they turn and go to another creator- the world, mtv, Hollywood… and their doctor says: “oh yea, you are right, this is a little off, but I am better… let me fix it for you!” And even after ten operations, they still cry and break on the inside…they do it silently in their own rooms, when nobody is watching, because now, they appear beautiful to themselves, but they are still not satisfied…it goes deeper than one’s appearance. God spent so much time on creating each one of us, both women and men. Read psalm 139 it will blow your mind away, on hearing about the precision of God’s own hands making you! And you were made marvelously! Sculpted from nothing into SOMEthing! Something beautiful, a matsterpeace. The image I gave you of American women above, is for all girls in this world. It is true image of what God has revealed to me through my friendships with those girls. I encourage you to encourage your girlfriends, and even guy-friends by giving them complements NOT on their clothes, shoes or make-up, but on their natural beauty that reflects the image and love of God, our Creator. Tell them that they are beautiful- look in their eyes and say that you mean it. And pray that you and your friends will also be able to see it. In times of dishonor for God’s temple and impurity, only prayer will allow us to see God’s original intend and creation at perfection; creation of which you are a part of- an important part.

Oh My beautiful and precious God, I pray that you will enable my friends to hear this message- this cry of my heart- for justice and restoration of the image of purity and woman which you created to shine your light through. May, not the make-up and clothes, cover up your light, but allow your light to become even stronger in us, so that it can breakthrough and shine through the things, that we daily put on, in order to cover up our true nature. The victory is yours and we need to see its physical reflection in this corrupted world; it starts with a prayer- the spiritual weapon, so God teach us how to pray, so we can hear and see you around us, so your beauty may be reflected to us and through us. You make all things new, please make us new Lord. In Jesus Holy and Precious name, I pray. Amen.